Yes, we love a chivalrous man, situations where we are made to feel like princesses and romantic relationships. But that doesn’t mean that we expect you to foot all our bills, give us the easy way out or tolerate our tantrums. We are all about feminism, and we feel that in any relationship, we need to be treated as equals. That means changing your mindset and letting us in, into the equal world.
Don’t confuse misandry with feminism: Feminists want equality for you too. Many guys are feminists and that doesn’t make them any less men. We know a lot of pseudo-feminism exists too but we can’t do much about it. Stop lashing out at all women because you face discrimination. We face it a lot more than you and can empathise.
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Some classiness please: Just know that passing comments on girls on the street is not going to get you anywhere. I don’t remember the last time a mother told her daughter, “I met your dad at the signal and then he said, Hey baby, want a ride? I’ll ride you fast and hard.”
We love chivalry, but not always: You really don’t need to give up your seat up every time. We understand that you are human too, and after a long, hard day at work you may just need it more than us.
We don’t want you to play the hero: We might like it when Ranbir Kapoor beats up the bad guys but honestly we know that life isn’t a movie and fighting four or five people at once is plain foolishness. So if someone passes a lewd comment on us, be it on the road, a bar, restaurant or anywhere, let it go. Rather stand up for a woman when she calls such people out.
We don’t mind paying up: We respect that you are a gentleman and wish to pay the entire bill but at the same time we also understand that it is your hard-earned money. It doesn’t feel good to let the other person spend on us every time. We feel good when we contribute too.
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It’s not us or your mom. It’s both: There is no competition involved between our relationship with you and your relationship with your mother. We won’t simply hate your mother without any reason and neither will we expect you to give up your family for us. We just expect the same respect towards our family from you.
Let’s not label each other: There are good girls and then there are bad girls, same as good guys and bad ones. Let’s not judge too easily. Rather stand up for each other when you feel like and talk to the person when you don’t.
Give respect, get respect: We know that there are a few aspects of life where we stand behind you, but that doesn’t mean you are superior. In fact, there are a whole lot of other aspects in life where you have to stand behind us and that doesn’t make us superior, either. It’s a give and take process.
We aren’t the only one with ‘advantages’: You might feel that women have too many legal advantages which they sometimes misuse but we’d like to point out that men have those very same social advantages which they also misuse. Let’s be careful with how we both use these advantages.
You can’t have everything: You can either have a wife who will be dependent on you and can single-handedly manage the household, children and family and you can be the provider. Or you can have a working independent wife who will have her opinions and will expect you to contribute to not just the income but household responsibilities.
Let’s fight to be equals, nothing else: In an ideal world, we’d be fine with you sitting next to us on public transport, without you asking for permission. Sadly, we cannot because we need to fight a constant battle against some men in society. So help us and make the fight easier.
Short skirts don’t equate loose morals: Being a modern girl who dresses how she pleases, doesn’t make us easy. We have our own morals – easy or not – and our skirts have nothing to do with it.
Girl code please: When a girl has long meaningful conversations with you, it means she is interested in hearing what you have to say. It does not necessarily imply that she is in love with you.
Respect, but without a label: Do not respect us just because we are your mother, sister, wife or daughter. Respect us because we are people.
We mean what we say: So a no really truly means NO. Don’t look for anything else in it.